I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
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