I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
