who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
