is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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