I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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