Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize