Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
i think i just lost a toe
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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