me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize