i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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