Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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