I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize