we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
