problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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