Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i was born a porn star she said
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
What changed your mind?
Being sober
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Randomize