My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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