And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
