I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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