A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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