It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
