i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
