This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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