i was rollin on her like bob the builder
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
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