Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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