The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
