vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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