super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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