Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
