I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize
