Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
