I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
