Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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