I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize