his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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