He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
