Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
