I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
