Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
