i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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