You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
