Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
