ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
she woke up with a sticky ear
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
