My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
