Don't you send me to vm
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
