In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
