it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Is it penis luge time yet?
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
