girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
