Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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