whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
