well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
