My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
