it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
organizing the empties. That sober.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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